Closure and letting go.
It’s a funny thing closure. Letting go is also quite a weird one. I seem to be finding lots of articles on letting go all over social media. I’m wondering if it’s an age thing? If people could learn to let go earlier in their lives, then there would be less to let go of when they get to a certain age and realise they’re not put on this earth just to work, pay bills and die.
Sometimes it takes a life trauma for people to feel the need to let go of ‘stuff’, but everyone has different stuff to let go of. Sometimes it’s just the cathartic clearing of the loft when you are moving house, or needing to make room for something new. In our house we have a rule that when we buy a new walking fleece it’s ‘one in, one out’. There is no need to keep the oldest one just in case. There are only so many coat hooks in the hall.
On an emotional level, letting go can be a huge issue for many of us. You often hear people saying that they just can’t let go of it. ‘It’ normally refers to some emotion wounding. Sometimes it takes a big shift in your own perception of life to realise that your memories are part of your story. You are like a movie. Good bits, bad bits, boring bits and amazing transformational bits. Lots of BITS. You are multifaceted, and need to have your bits! They make up who you are. The trick is how much attention you give the bits that no longer serve you. In a movie, you tend to remember the best bits. So focus on the best bits of you and your life.
Sometimes the awkward bits or the deeply wounding bits will pop up to remind you that you have a story, but try not to give them too much attention. Move forwards. Honour your past, but try not to be consumed by it. The past has gone, it’s part of your movie and it can shape your future, but when it holds you back, it’s time to address it and let it go. Very often when I am treating clients with deep massage and LaStone, it can trigger a great deal of emotional release. Sometimes outwardly, and sometimes it can be seen as an energy shift within the body. Massage is a powerful healer and this a great time of year to spring clean your emotions. Treatments such as Reiki can also help rebalance and give you some focus.
Spring is also a great time to clean your home, empty the loft and sort out your wardrobe. The pile of magazines you thought you would read but now they are a year old? Just move them along. If you are holding on to things that no longer make you happy, pass them on to someone who would like them. If you become melancholy when looking at the contents in that trunk in the loft, notice how this makes you feel, and be brave –
Get rid of it!
We often keep things to remind us of our younger days and there is nothing wrong in that, but keeping your 18th birthday cards, that you haven’t looked at in years, and you have no idea who half the senders were, well just get rid! Freeing up some space, gives you room to move in to your future. I’m not saying you should clear out everything in your loft. Keep your photos, your wedding dress, old love letters and anything that makes you smile. We all have a box of memorabilia, but when that box is actually the whole loft, then it’s time for a cathartic clear out. You will always have memories and sometimes some treasured possessions help trigger these glimpses into your past. I’m always a little concerned when people feel the need to ditch all their worldly goods. When we get older, sometimes we need a trigger to bring those beautiful memories to the forefront of our minds, but mostly we all own too much clutter that just gets in the way of remembering the good stuff!
When you do eventually have a clear out, you will no doubt find things to spark a memory inside. Recently I found some paintings in the loft that I did nearly 20 years ago.
It reminded me how much I loved to paint but as life got busy with running my two salons, I stopped. This memory has triggered me in to starting again. On the other hand, I also found a pile of old fabric and buttons that I ‘saved’ from my grans house when it was being cleared after she passed away. I will never use the hundreds of buttons that I kept it as it seemed like a waste to throw them away. I have given them away to a client who does a lot of crafting.
The paintings I shall keep. They have inspired me to be creative again. The don’t take up much space!